But change makes the world go ‘round and I stopped before the blanket got monstrous. After binding off, I saw two things:  the blanket was definitely big enough and I’d purled when I should have knitted about halfway through the blanket.  That gives it personality, right?

On top of that, I could then see every single bad part about my cabling. But if I just glance at it, I think it’s pretty good. Unfortunately, I can’t share a picture yet.  My sister-in-law may or may not read this blog, and on the off chance she does, I want her to see the blanket for the first time when she gets it in the mail.

To get me through the knitting process, I’ve been watching a lot of TV, not counting movies. 

1.  American Horror Story – The creepy opening credits had me riveted every single time.  The show was good too. It amazes me the things FX can get away with. I especially liked the cameo appearances. If you want to like your TV characters, though, I don’t know if you’ll like this show. There are no heroic types.

2. The League – Another FX show, one that I find really funny, though I have to wonder how one group of people can be so horrible. Not sure if I liked S3 as much as I liked the first 2, but I liked the cameos (Jeff Goldblum and Seth Rogen, among them).

3. Face Off – I had to clarify to my mom that I wasn’t referring to the Cage/Travolta movie but to the SyFy reality show where makeup and effects artists compete for some money and even more makeup. The first season was awesome. Most of those people had talent and the stuff they turned out was great. Season Two…not so much. A couple of them have talent, but overall,  I haven’t been impressed. But the show is still entertaining and still going, so it has a few more episodes to redeem itself.

4. Scrubs – I’m flying solo for Season 8 for two reasons.  J-Felb burned out, getting more annoyed with the characters than I am. That’s the first reason. The second reason is that I’m only a few episodes in and have had my own personal cry-fests. I don’t know if the rest of the season is like that, but talk about turning on the waterworks. I’ve heard bad things about the final season, but it’s not that bad, in my opinion. 

There’s also been intermittent watchings of Star Trek and The Twilight Zone (Original Episodes), both of which I really enjoy, but they only hold my attention for so long. Tonight, we’re starting “Supernatural,” another show I’ve heard good things about but just never had much interest in. And in keeping with the way of things, I cast on for a pair of socks for my mom, so I won’t be without a project over the next run of television shows.

Mom doesn’t read my blog, so I might get away with some pictures if I can remember to take them.

NOTE: Yes, all my links are from IMDB. I realize this is kind of lazy, and there are those who may take issue with it. Too bad. I like to do things quick and easy, hence the reason I’m not a professional blogger. Party on!

I have no interest in being a “regular” college student again, but I can get behind these correspondence courses which let me go at my own pace from the comfort of my recliner. Plus, these courses are centralized in one field, so I find I absorb the information better with my mind already geared in that direction from what I do in the office.  While it’s not stuff I would have ever thought about, a lot of it is pretty interesting.

Friday night took me back to the days of cramming for tests and pulling all nighters.  I didn’t actually stay up all night, and I didn’t have to cram, but I was determined to get the course done and over with. My fellow co-worker/student and I got together to kick out the last five tests, and the process included some high octane from Starbucks, some cigarettes (I don’t smoke regularly, but I do puff occasionally when the mood calls for it…normally when I’m drinking but now apparently when I’m schooling), and working past midnight.  Midnight is a far cry from “all night,” but I’m older now and have a bedtime of no later than 10 most nights, so I definitely had that bleary eyed, overtired feeling by midnight thirty.

By the third to the last test, I hated myself and wanted to quit. Luckily, Fellow Student wasn’t going to let me and we finally clicked the final exam and called it good.

It’s not a huge thing, but I definitely feel good about it. I feel accomplished. I feel like I can tackle every course there is with flying colors and feel infinitely more connected to the world of knowledge. Which is probably why some people love school and continue to pursue higher education.  I know my family always wanted me to do the same, but after burning out, I just couldn’t make myself go back, at least not at the university pace.

Since these courses are somewhat on my terms, the Monday after I finished that test, I signed up for the next course, which is bite size at 60 days but considered a little tougher than the last one. Still, it gives me something to strive for and another goal for next month.  Now, I just need to pass with an high grade to get that next certificate.

I have two goals for this month, not “resolutions” but actual projects I want to finish by the 29th (thank you, Leap Year, for giving me that extra day). Granted, I have some general things I’d like to accomplish as well…like cooking at home more and getting to the gym most days of the week…but that’s kind of an ongoing thing.

1. Finish knitting the baby blanket – I don’t have a catchy name for said baby blanket, but it’s going to be for my newest neice or nephew due in June. If I gave myself until closer to the due date, I’d have plenty of time to finish, but I also have some other knitting projects on the list, including two sweater requests and an undetermined number of knitted socks for my mother, who has talked me into giving her a pair of mine until I can knit her another pair of her own (this is cool with me…I don’t wear them often enough and I know she will, so they’ll be going to a good home).

2. Finish my correspondence class – Last April I started a correspondence class through my job. I had a year to complete it, so wouldn’t you know, I put most of it off for several months. Now I’m ready to get it done and over with, and having it done by the end of February would put me in a good position to start another one early in the year (one of my Day Zero goals is to do every correspondence course offered by my company).

I could probably set more, but I don’t want to get overwhelmed and burned out. I’ll still be working on my book-a-week reading goal, my quest to clean and pack the apartment, and my mission to stay organized and on top of things, but at least I have a couple things that I can actually celebrate upon completion.

I don’t want people thinking I’m a complete recluse, but it’s often easier for me to be introverted than to deal with even the trace amounts of social anxiety I get. It’s also harder for me to be social when I’m not feeling well, and in hindsight, 2011 was not a feel good year for me, even when I started trying to get healthier.

The beginning of this year sees me feeling much better in general, physically, emotionally, and mentally…all factors that play into me being a more social person.

This past weekend brought Drunken DnD, where my fellow gamer friends and I got together for some gaming (incidentally, not DnD) and some drinks. My heavy party days are behind me, but I had enough to relax and have fun without doing anything embarrassing or having to take up couch space. Unfortunately, I tend to relax a little too much…I get sleepy and zone out really easily. However, I have some hilarious friends, so there was no way I was going to fall asleep.

There was a little bit of “fun” business on Sunday when I went to a local gaming convention meeting. I helped with the con a few years ago, then took a break for various reasons. I decided this year to get back into it and help out, and the first meeting was good. I’m still not sure what the dates are going to be, but we have some good ideas and I get to plan some discussion panels and seminars. Plus, I’ll probably get to run a game at the con itself, which will help me stretch my DM fingers again.

After watching several episode of “The IT Crowd” with a friend that afternoon, I attended the local SnB Knitting Group for the first time since it started. Like any new situation, it was slightly awkward, but the people were nice and I made some good progress on the blanket that I’m determined to have done by the end of February. I wasn’t overly thrilled with the local donut shop it was held at, but I’m not really a fan of donuts (I had one because I was hungry, but they’re never my first choice of snack). Or small chairs that are not made for a larger rear end, such as my own. Still, I’m probably going to go again, maybe even next Sunday after we get home from Wichita.

As with the other areas of my life I’m trying to balance, I want to find a good medium between friend time and alone time. I feel like I’ve been a little extreme on either end in the past, but like anything else, it doesn’t necessarily have to be an all or nothing issue.

Even in terms of balance, this past weekend was good.

Feeling healthier and exercising is helping too, because I don’t feel as sick or socially anxious.

The not stressing thing also includes trying to find balance and shedding my all or nothing mentality. Take blogging, for instance. Last year I stressed about not doing it, but the fact that I was trying to force myself to do it made it unappealing. And let’s face it…I normally don’t have enough to say to keep anyone interested. So I decided I’d do it in my own time, and if people read what I blogged, cool. If not, oh well. I was never destined for fame anyway, internet or otherwise.

I’ve also stopped trying to get to all of my social network sites every day.  I go on Facebook every couple days or so. Same for Twitter. Tumblr is about a once a week check and even then I only browse or do a couple general “blah blah” type posts. I read an article awhile back (too far to even remember where) about social networking guilt. I don’t have it…much.

But while I’m cutting back on things, I’m also setting small goals to help me feel like I’ve accomplished something, because I hate the feeling of just being a lump. For instance, most days I’m setting a timer and actually cleaning, organizing, and packing. I’m trying to read a book a week, and I’m finding knitting projects and trying to set time goals. As for organizing, I have a handle on bills, email labels, and my work space at the office is finally feeling not so overwhelming.

All these things combined, seasoned with the little things I tend to really enjoy (my current tea kick, talking to my mom, spending time with my husband, relaxing in my snuggie) have made for a good start to the year. It hasn’t been all roses, but overall I’m feeling good and able to handle things that have come my way.

Onward, I’m hoping to keep this trend going for the next 11.5 months.

A.

Going into it, I didn’t have the perspective of watching a mystery because I knew how it ended. So I watched for the acting and the cinematography and the overall feel of the film (not that I thought it was a feel good film, but I got to focus on more than just the constant “I bet he did it…I bet she did it” thought processes I usually experience when watching a mystery).

A quick, spoiler free synopsis: Journalist Mikael Blomkvist is hired by a rich business man to solve the mystery of what happened to his niece forty years prior when she disappeared without a trace. During his investigation, Mikael enlists the help of Lisbeth Salander, a computer hacker with a photographic memory, to help him solve the mystery that also encompasses the strange murders of several women.

It’s a dark movie, and there are several scenes that are highly inappropriate for young children (though the couple in front of me brought there young daughter who couldn’t have been more than 8). If you’re not familiar with anything about the movie, there is a particularly brutal rape scene that makes me very uncomfortable. I didn’t realize how much until I started getting anxious the closer the scene got (I feel this says something good about me…I’m not completely corrupted no matter how many other graphic movies have failed to phase me).

TGWtDT doesn’t offer any big shoot ‘em up scenes or action sequences. It’s a quiet, slower movie that relies heavily on its characters and the mystery aspect.  I love Lisbeth Salander.  There are those that would argue against her being a “strong” female, but I believe she is because she endures the things that life throws at her (and there’s alot of it, more that’s revealed in the next two books).

The casting for the movie was great. Daniel Craig makes a good Blomkvist…sullen, dry, yet likable in his own way.  I’d heard through the grapevine…meaning I’d read on some forums and comment threads…that some people didn’t think Rooney Mara would do as well as the girl from the original Swedish version, but she was pretty amazing in the role of Lisbeth.  The rest of the cast was good, especially when compared with the book and the original movie.

I think what Fincher does well is to take out the elements of the story that made it drag. There were a few changes , but they were ones that worked for the story and didn’t detract from the plot. The movie also has good comedic timing. It’s not a comedy, but there are moments in which a line is delivered in just the right way to elicit a chuckle. A very small chuckle, but definitely something to ease the dark mood of the movie.

My favorite part of the whole film was the opening sequence, a mirage of dark images involving computer cords and hardware wrapped around human figures and set to Trent Reznor’s remake of  ”Immigrant Song.” I can’t explain it well enough to do it justice,  but even if you don’t watch the whole movie, when it comes out on DVD, find a way to watch it.

The movie gets a solid A grade from me, and I can’t wait to see the next two in the series. I think if Fincher stays on as the director, they’re bound to be good.

When I started going to the gym back in May, I was pretty much stuck on the one machine, the recumbent stepper. I was familiar with it and I could do it for a half hour, unlike any machine where I had to stand or walk, because at the time, I couldn’t do either one for long periods of time.

I always kind of looked at the recumbent bike as another option for “some time down the road,” but that machine had its own issues. For me, getting on it was an issue. Fat, unexercised legs don’t always like to raise high enough, and mine really didn’t. Besides the mobility, I had alot of pain right there in the area where the leg meets the hip. Then, even if I did get my leg over the middle of the bike, there was no way I could get my feet into the pedals.

I’ve been wanting to try it again just based on the increased flexibility and less pain I’ve had  from working out regularly. Today, Felbington and I went to the gym, and there were only two other people there, so I decided to try it. I’ve put it off and put it off, mostly because I didn’t want a lot of people to watch me try to wallow my way onto that stupid machine. With only two people, one of whom was back by the weights and wouldn’t even notice, I figured it was worth a try.

In the past, when I’ve actually tried to lose weight, I’ve been very conscious of every new thing my body could do. But now that I’m not focusing on that, I’m still stuck in the mentality of what I can’t do…or couldn’t do. Even as I went to lift my leg over, I said out loud, “I’m not going to even be able to lift my leg that high.” And then of course my leg goes over easily.

Then, I sit down and say, “Okay, these pedals are still going to be difficult.” And like that, my feet are in the stirrups and I’m ready to roll. That was unexpected.

Being on it was half the battle. Actually working out on it was the other half, and one I only won for like 2 minutes. The seat adjusts, but I couldn’t find a comfortable adjustment for my height, so I was either too far down and eating my knees or too far back and stretching to make the biking motion. For the two minutes, I had to scoot my butt down and basically sprawl out on the bike to make it work, which wasn’t comfortable. I decided to give it up for the time being.

However, knowing that I can get on that thing means I’m going to try it again very soon. And one of these days, I’m actually going to put some serious time in on that recumbent bike.

M.

Over the past weekend, I watched the first season because the whole series came on Netflix Instant View (which I guess I don’t have to call “Instant View” anymore since the company is splitting up, so just Netflix from here on out).  I have such mixed feelings about this show, a sort of television love/hate relationship. A couple years ago I tried watching several back seasons as well as the current season, but I gave up.

I don’t remember what season it was, but it was really annoying me. There was so much drama, more than I’d seen in previous seasons and that’s saying a lot because for a show about weight loss, which is dramatic anyway. The editing and directing staff manages to find every other ounce of drama and brings it hardcore.

There was also constant product placement…constant! I was waiting for them to start pimping toilet paper brands to show which was the softest on your butt when you’re trying to lose weight. After awhile, it seemed apparent that the show was more interested in keeping up with its cash cow than it was with actually helping people lose weight. And as far as that part goes, I know they made an effort later, but the methods weren’t realistic for normal people and yet they always failed to mention that your body won’t normally lose 10 lbs in the third week of weight loss.

For all my “hate,” though, there are some things I like about the show. Besides the fact that it’s TV crack and highly addicting, I like seeing the progress of people who lose weight, I like watching them workout because it motivates me to keep going to the gym, and…I’ll admit it…while I hate the drama, I also love the drama.  And I cry alot, especially during those times when people get to talk to their families. For whatever reason, whenever that happens on a reality show, I go Niagara Falls from the tear ducts.

Another opinion I’ve found to be fairly unpopular? I love Jillian Michaels and totally dislike Bob Harper.  My perception of Bob is that he finds a way to make everything about him. Jillian is psycho, but she gets results and I think she does things more for the contestants’ benefit than because she wants to make new friends.

I’m going to power through and see how long I can get before I give up or throw a weight on the ground in protest.

A.

I feel like I’m going through a bunch of dental foreplay at the moment. The appointment a few weeks ago was just to look at my mouth and tell me what needed to be done. I was under the impression that today was going to be some of the deep, painful stuff. But the hygienist needed to take some more measurements and only had an hour to do everything, so stuff happened, but it wasn’t what I was expecting.

She ended up cleaning above the gum line, which involved a zappy little thing zinging at my teeth and gums. It wasn’t horrible. I got to listen to the Morning Show while it was going on, and there was a little bit of pain but nothing that I couldn’t handle. When it was over, she gave me a new cleaning regimen which involves salt rinses, extra brushing and flossing, and the use of weird little bristly tools that I’ve never even seen before. The salt rinses will be easy, the brushing will be annoying, but easy, but I loathe flossing. It hurts my mouth! Of course, the dentist showed me how it should be done which isn’t how I’ve ever actually done it.  Supposedly it won’t hurt as much when my mouth heals up, but still…I’m not looking forward to it.

But at least I feel like I’m doing something good for myself.

When it was over, my teeth were ultra sensitive, and the headache I woke up with was worse, so I ended up taking some pain pills and sleeping through the day. After the nap, everything felt better. Now I have to wait two months and then go back for the rest of it, which will for sure be more painful and will involve full on mouth numbing action.

I’ll be so glad when all this crap is done with.

A.